2009 Sr. High Fall Retreat Follow-up

The name of our retreat this year was "More Than A Song." While not the first retreat I have programmed it is the first retreat that I have programmed and facilitated and spoke at. Our goal for this retreat was to communicate the idea that worship is more than a song. We had three sessions covering three different areas articulating this idea. Our first session was immediate upon our arrival at the camp.

Worship is what we were created for- we began our session by doing something very important. Acknowledging that worship is singing. It is on a Sunday morning and a Wednesday night. But also admitting that it is so much more than that. We listened to the song Clear the Stage by Ross King. This songs verses communicate the idea that we need to get everything that stands between God and us out of the way and then pursue Him fervently. There should be no reason that we place anything before Him. Then we looked at Col. 1:16-18. We are created by Him, for Him. Through looking at Revelation 3:14-21 we know that He doesn't want us to be partially committed. Sometimes we get caught up in the intensity of worship. In the feelings. In what we get out of it. Sometimes we forget that worship is more than a song. That it's a deep and intense longing to be with God. To hold Him. To catch a glimpse of Him. To simply be in His presence. What would it be like to be in Simon's shoes? To honor and hope for something that much? To wait and still believe? (Luke 2:21-35). We are created to be bare before Him.

Worship is how you treat others- For this session we had Brian Hess (Youth Leader from Hempfield BIC) join us to help facilitate our time on the ropes course. We began our time by saying that worship infiltrates our whole lives. It is what we were created for and who we are meant to be all the time. It can't just be a song on a Sunday morning or a Wednesday night. It can't just be a prayer before a forgotten test or after terrible news. Because we are honoring God at other times, with our lives. So if we can we should consider this approach to worship. Worship is how you treat others. Its how we talk, interact, touch, love, and treat those around us. Especially those we don't like or those we can't stand. We read Matthew 22:34-40. It should say something to each of us that the one of the two greatest commandments is to love your neighbor as yourself. So much of the time we then ask the question: Who is your neighbor? We beat around the bush and many times attempt to find loop holes for those that we do not like. But the simple truth is that your neighbor is everyone. This morning we worship together as a group by trying our hand at a multitude of different initiatives. To prepare our hearts for worship think through a few questions. How can I honor the greatest commandments today during the initiatives I am doing?

Worship is your whole life- For this session we began by listening to the song, Clear the Stage, again. We revisited the words and challenge that it presented us with. We then read a story which brought us to the conclusion that our actions speak louder than our words. Then by taking a few quotes from the movie August Rush and changing the word "music" to "worship" we find ourselves with quotes that passionately describe worship. For instance "You never quit on your music. No matter what happens. Cuz anytime something bad happens to you, that's the one place you can escape to and just let it go." Now change the words and we ask a question like : Where do you feel the most comfortable worshiping? What connects you with God? Or take this quote: "You got to love music more than you love food. More than life. More than yourself." Switch the words and ask what stands between you and worship? What do you love more than it? Than God? We then ended our session on this premise: John 4:24 says Worship in spirit and truth. It's time to be honest with God and with ourselves. I can't stress this enough: OUR WHOLE LIVES ARE HOW WE WORSHIP GOD. NOT WHO WE ARE AT CHURCH. NOT WHAT WE DO WHEN WE SING. OUR WHOLE LIVES. WHO WE ARE IS HOW WE LOVE GOD.

Parents, when you get the chance remind your children that while the easy and common thing to do is to lead separate lives at church or school. In fact many scholars (Chap Clark, Hurt) would go so far as to say that we give permission and encouragement to our youth, to lead separate lives in the areas of school, church, home, sports, sects of friends, and classrooms. They get used to different expectations and different rules in each area. It becomes simple and well, easy to be different people in different places. The challenge for us is to remember that we worship in spirit and in truth. With our whole lives. Remember it and live differently. Christians always preach that their lives should look differently than those of non-Christians. Books like Unchristian tell us that they don't. So maybe the difference is all in how they're the same. We lead the same life 24/7. In all places, in all times. Who we are is how we love God.

2010 Sr High Mens Retreat Follow-Up

I wanted to take a brief opportunity to follow-up on our very first Sr. High Men's Retreat. As you know the title of our retreat was Romance, Bromance and Hand Grenades. Not only was this a title but it also happened to be the title of each of our three sessions. As the retreat wore on and the topics continued in increasing seriousness we came up with a phrase: "What happens on the Men's Retreat stays at the Men's Retreat." So what I would like to do is explain each of the topics to you so that you have a chance of understanding what we talked about a little better and thus being able to facilitate conversation with your son...whether they attended or not.

Romance- In this session we discussed dating and how to keep the girl without losing the faith. How do you date in the world that we live in, with the values that our friends have, television have, movies have, our parents have, our church has and still be able to date. Our speaker, Kurt Funk, gave us 8 steps to achieve this goal.
1. Understand the purpose of dating is to prepare yourself for dating and marriage one day (Gen. 2:24)
2. Find a girl worth dating by asking: a. does she respect herself? b. will she compromise you sexually? c. does she have a heart for the Lord? Really? (1 Cor. 15:33)(Prov. 6:20-7:27)
3. Set boundaries because it is easier to mess up than ever before with influences from the internet, school, tv, friends, commercials, etc. (1 Tim. 5:1-2)(Titus 2:4-8)
4. Stick to your boundaries. The process we go through in breaking our boundaries is 1) in our thoughts, 2) our physical involvement, 3) rationalizing our actions. (1 Cor. 6:9-7:19)
5. Don't be selfish. Relationships aren't all about you and what you can get out of it. There is another person involved so we need to remember something important: 1 Cor. 13:5
6. Learn to forgive. We all make mistakes. ALL of us. So we all need forgiveness. ALL of us. Paul spells it out again in 1 Cor. 13:5.
7. Pray for each other. What is one of the greatest things that you can share with another person? Your faith. Your prayers. (James 5:16)
8. Never compare. EVER. The grass is not greener on the other side. The grass is greener where you water it. Two imperfect people cannot have a perfect relationship. Just doesn't work.

Bromance- this is a very interesting word that can be defined as a complex relationship between two straight males. In other words, the deep male friendship that men just don't like to talk about. Kurt Funk also delivered the message for this session. Bromance is all about "one another". There are 58 "one anothers" in scripture. We looked at 8.
1. John 13:35 - love one another
2. Proverbs 27:17 - sharpen one another
3. Romans 15:7 - accept one another
4. Corinthians 3:13 - forgive one another
5. Galatians 6:2 - bear one anothers burdens
6. Romans 15:14 - teach one another
7. 1 Thess. 5:11 - encourage one another
8. Galatians 5:13 - serve one another

Hand Grenades- Parents, I will have less to offer you, by the way of notes, for this section because much of this was shared via personal experience by our second speaker, Matt Hunter. What I can tell you is that this session was all about the different things that can mess up or "blow up" (much like hand grenades) the relationships mentioned previously. Addictions to things like lust and pornography. One very interesting thing that Matt brought up was that internet capable cell phones and ipods have the capability of being the largest stash of porn anyone has ever seen. It's like holding every magazine and every volume ever created in the palm of your hand. The simple fact of the matter is that visual things trip men up every day. We have to consciously make an effort to "bounce" our eyes and our minds.

Parents, all I can say is good luck. As a group of young men we have discussed these issues. On the level of youth pastor and youth group we have talked about these things. Some of your sons have come to me one on one as well. Now you have the opportunity of being able to talk with your son about issues that are pertinent to his life and his well being especially if we think of well being extending to one's relationship with God. If you have any questions or would like me to assist in your discussion of these issues, please contact me.

2010 Jr. High Spring Retreat Follow Up

Over the last school year I have been very impressed with the level of maturity that the Jr. High has had with topics and conversation on Wednesday night. Because of this I chose a rather mature topic to talk about with them on our spring retreat: The Acts church (Acts 2:42-47). We entitled our retreat the Living Acts Church because thats what our students are: The living church.

In the first section of that scripture we learn that the people of the original church devoted themselves to four things. This weekend we talked about three of them: Teaching, fellowship and prayer. Further than that we spent some time discussing what it means to be devoted. We listened to what the students thought and we heard from some youth leaders to gain the adult perspective. This led into a discussion of Christ's level of devotion to us and in turn how we should be to him. We ended with devotion being defined as something you would give your life to.

Friday night we opened with an overview of the scripture we would be studying and a discussion on teaching. I asked the kids if they felt like there was anything in their lives that they were devoted to. It was interesting to me how difficult it was for them to answer that question. I then pushed the question, "of the three things that the Acts church was devoted to, which do you find to be the most difficult?" The answers varied across the room but the largest majority landed on prayer.

This led us into a discussion of our first topic: teaching. We talked about what makes a good teacher and how teaching might have looked different in Bible times than it does now. I asked if they thought it was possible for a person in today's world to be devoted to teaching and they originally said no, but settled on yes. The kids were very productive and discerning in their conversations around our topics.

The next morning after a big Kenbrook breakfast we moved on to the topic of fellowship. I began conversation by asking them what fellowship was and then moving into the idea that fellowship can be just hanging out and "chillin" with their friends but it is also so much more. I told them that we are called by God to be in fellowship....to be devoted to each other. We read Matthew 22:34-40 to them and we talked about how it should tell us something that one of the two greatest commandments calls us to love our neighbor. Rather than continue discussion of this topic we then moved to live it out. We did a sequence of games and activities designed to inspire trust and the requirement of the group working together.

Finally in our last session we continued in our journey of discussion and action together by broaching the idea of prayer. We began by proving the difference between knowing about someone and knowing someone by talking about Abraham Lincoln; someone we can never have conversation with. This led us to the important realization that we have the opportunity to actually know God through prayer. Some students really struggle with prayer and the idea of talking to God. One student mentioned that prayer makes God less scary. So to show "the how" of prayer we looked at the Lord's prayer and I explained it in very basic terms. Once I felt students had an understanding of it I had the students do a prayer walk. I sent them on a short journey around the retreat side of camp to walk in creation and to pray, draw or write to God. When they returned we closed our discussion with a story of devotion.

All in all I would say that this was an excellent retreat and I'm excited for conversations that may come out of it for you as parents. If you have any questions feel free to contact me or stop by for a chat. This group of Jr. Higher's have a lot to offer us. I'm excited to continue in this journey with them!

2010 Ladies Lock In

The title of this year's spring retreat was thought of by the female students on our leadership team. The girls also chose the topics to speak about which geared this retreat specifically to them. However, since I had chosen to break up our Sr. High spring retreat into separate guy/girl retreats, I could not be on this one. Laura Sider and Leigh McCauley (Children's Ministry Intern) planned and implemented the entire retreat. I am grateful for their hard work and diligence in this effort. Below is a follow-up letter written by Leigh to assist you, the parent, in following up with the retreat. --Nick Ressler

This summer the SR. High Girls Lock-In theme was "Beauty Brains and bobby-pins" The goal of the whole retreat was to equip the young girls with the tools or "bobby-pins "of being a woman of God. Being beautiful in today's society is almost impossible, but we know the truth of Godly beauty is found within all of us. There were three sessions centered on true Godly beauty, healthy boundaries and stepping into the light of beauty. The teaching was primarily drawn from 1Peter.

Our first session Friday night was entitled "Worldly beauty vs. Godly beauty" I led this session and centered around 5 central "bobby pins" of beauty which are:

1. Beauty through trials (1 Peter 1:12-13)
2. Humility (1 Peter 5:507)
3. Self-Control (1 Peter 5:8-9)
4. Purity (1 Peter 1:14-17)
5. Gentleness (1 Peter 3:4)

Beauty is something that is not just external, and Godly beauty is concerned of things of character and matters of the heart. Don't be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God-1 Peter 3:3-4
Being beautiful is having fruit in your life that will honor God. The LORD doesn't see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart-1 Samuel 16:7. In the secular world value is placed upon appearance but in the kingdom of God value is constant, and God says that we are invaluable and loved eternally for whom we are not what we look like. We can talk about this and understand it but walking out this truth can be a challenge. Constantly we are bombarded by the media and peer pressure to adapt to the culture definition of being beautiful. The ways to break out of that pressure it to surround yourself with strong women of God that can help keep you focused and support you and encourage the beautiful things that God values.

The Second Session was entitled "Emoting Modesty". For women it can be easy to open up to someone you trust and share your emotions and feelings. God has given each of us discernment and this session focused on how to discern friendship and boundaries with our emotions. Girls having best friends that are boys are a very tricky thing. Maintaining healthy boundaries with our male friends in very important because our emotions are sacred and not to be shared with everyone. Dating is something that should be thoughtfully considered, in romantic relationships it is easy to feel comfortable with your boyfriend but emotional modesty is important as well as physical modesty. God has given each woman a precious gift, other women to confide in and become best-friends with. Sometimes it is hard for a woman to reach out and ask for support or encouragement but it is something that we all need. Women leaning on women for support and prayer is vital to developing into a true beautiful woman.

Our third session was entitled "Stepping into the light" - Imagery was used to illustrate our journey into freedom of beauty. Teaching was centered around a "bathroom" - a room that was dark except for a light on one end of a long room hanging about a mirror. There is a light switch that we can control to illuminate our true selves, blemishes and all. To truly become free we need to step into the light and receive the truth of who we are and let God heal the pain of our blemishes. You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous-how well I know it.Psalm 139:13-14 In life, through trials it is easy to want to keep the light off and live in deception of our true beauty and not face our whole selves but to have Gods true freedom we need to see ourselves in the light. Leaning on our sister in the Lord is a gift that we have through the journey of walking in the light. We don't always like what we see in the mirror but there is great beauty to be seen.

Our weekend was a dynamic fun time of fellowship, sharing and good girl time. We all have true Godly beauty inside of us and through trials and lessons we can grow more and more into the women that God ultimately has designed us to be. The world tells us that beauty is what you look like and that beauty will fade and is false. Godly beauty true beauty is the beauty that is found in the heart of a person, the characteristics that are unseen. Charm is deceptive, and beauty do not last; but a woman who fears the LORD will be greatly praised - Proverbs 31:30 --Leigh McCauley

Youth Publication Survey

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